Maternity leave over, 3 month pic

Went back to work on Monday. 12 weeks seems way to little to leave a baby but what can you do? I know she will be in good hands with her sisters at daycare but I would feel much better about it if she were a little older. I cried on my drive into work but I really did miss my coworkers, adult conversations and my work. So it's nice to be back to work, though I wish I could be home at the same time if that makes sense.

We had some trouble getting Morgan to take a bottle at first. I waited till 7 weeks to give her one and she really didn't like it at first. I've been giving her an occasional bottle at home and mixing in a little formula here and there with the hope of her sleeping a little better. I guess she's been taking her bottle with the sitter okay. She's drinking only 2-3 oz at a time every couple hours, which is probably about how she was feeding at home. I probably started a bad habit of feeding her when she woke up (eat, play, sleep cycle) but also feeding her again to get her to fall asleep.

I've been debating stopping breastfeeding but am keeping up with it for now. My goal was to make it through maternity leave and now that I've passed that I can't decide. Sometimes I think it would be a lot easier if I could have her on formula. It's hard to nurse a baby when you have two toddlers that need you too! So I'll see how that goes. For now I am nursing when she wakes up, pumping three times at work (which may be an issue once I am ramped up back on my accounts and super busy), nursing at home at night and topping her off with a little formula before bed and then doing one last pump around 10:30. I have plenty of milk stored up in the freezer and I am pumping 13-15 oz during the day at work which I sending with her to daycare. After having horrible supply issues last time around this is a nice change. I pumped 7 oz at 9 am this morning which is my personal best even with twins. I feel ridiculously proud of this, ha. Motherhood changes you!

Morgan is sleeping pretty well but unpredictable. She goes to sleep around 8 or 8:30 and wakes up anywhere between 3 and 7. Luckily when she does wake up super early, she'll go right back to bed after a feed. So by text book definition she is sleeping through the night (defined as only 7 to 8 hours) but waking up at 4:30 a.m. to feed her on my first day back at work hardly felt like sleeping through the night to me! Thankfully the past two nights she has slept till 6:45 when I had to wake her up for daycare. I am so beyond tired. I would love to just sleep for a week straight. I know it won't always be like this (and someday I will miss it) but I am dragging right now. Coffee is my best friend.

Morgan is such a sweet baby girl. She is already laughing out loud. I am amazed at how big and strong she is compared to her preemie sisters. At this rate she'll be walking next month!